Sunday, July 6, 2014

Star Readings: Phyllis Hyman.

Skip all the pleasant shit and get to the point! (In Ms.Hyman's voice.) Contrary to popular belief Ms. Hyman did not end her life over a man. (i KNEW what I wanted to do) I'm hearing as I write this. She was open hearted almost to a fault. She was also one who trusted too easily but also guarded. She still checks in on her family and friends from time to time. Her third sister especially. Before she passed she was slowly pulling herself out of debt. Even though her estate still is in debt. One of the reasons she became so depressed was because there was too much stock going into trends. (I couldn't compete with the young girls and I didn't want to.) There were risks she wanted to take in the industry when it came to her music three years before her passing. Writing, producing. (I wanted to do everything, I wanted complete control) (Dance,a full on Jazz album and a duet record with Nancy Wilson was in the works,) Phyllis now just wants to remember but left alone. (I'm very happy where I am.) Handle the other shit on your own.) So with that I say to you Ms. Hyman thanks for your music and memories and may your spirit truly be at peace.

Love, Leo Brown :)

Monday, June 16, 2014

Motivational Monday: Life is a Celebration!

Happy Monday Cubbers! Today's Motivational Monday Message is all about this thing called life. Life can either be a pity party or a constant celebration it is totally up to you to see. Thanks for watching and be sure to leave your comments!

Love, Leo Brown :)

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Ratchet Wednesday:The Heathers Lady Marmalade.

Ratchet Wednesday: The Heathers Lady Marmalade. Happy Wednesday Cubbers! Today Leo takes a look at the Heathers version of Lady Marmalade starring Carmen Carrera, Raja Gemini, Delta Work and Manlia Luzon. Thanks for watching and tell me what you think!

Love, Leo Brown :)

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Behind the Candied Heart: The Origins of Valentine's Day.

Tomorrow the great holiday known as Valentine's Day will make its presence known. When we think of Valentine's Day images of cards and thoughts of romance and passion play with our minds and bodies, along with the heart-shaped chocolates that take hold of us and never let go.  What about Valentine's Day before it became the commercial holiday that is today?  Why not go back to the beginnings of this scared holy day. That has been in our culture longer than we realize.

When in Rome.

The day of that we know as Valentine's Day started as an roman festival to honor the goddess of marriage Juno.  During this time the people of rome were separated. The people started the custom of writing the names of who they were interested in the day before the festival took place. The person's names were written on pieces of paper and inserted into jars. Each person then drew a name from the jar and they were then paired up with their mate throughout the festival. After being paired, the couples would often continue to see each other throughout the year and on occasion even fell in love and got married.

 What's in a Name?

Having a difficult time recruiting men as soldiers, Roman emperor Claudius cancelled all engagements and marriages throughout Rome.
It wasn't until St. Valentine, a priest of Rome, secretly married couples. He was eventually caught and arrested. His death took place on February 14th, 270.
The holiday that we know as Valentine's Day is named in his honor.

What a Card!

Valentine's Day greetings became a part of our culture thanks to the middle ages. During this time, lovers sang or spoke their sentiments. Paper and written Valentines became popular at the end of the 15th Century. By the 18th century, gift-giving and exchanging hand-made cards on valentine's day became common in England. These hand-made cards were made of lace, ribbons and featured pictures of cupids and hearts. This trend eventually caught on spreading to the American colonies.

The oldest valentine's day card in the world is on display in the British Museum.  The tradition of Valentine's cards did not become widespread in the United States, however, until the 1850s, when Esther A. Howland. A woman who hailed from Worcester, Mass started to mass produce them.

There you have it. You now know how this great holiday came into our lives.  I hope that for those of you who celebrate this day realize this important thing: Love is both joy, pain and comes in many forms. You don't need a mate to celebrate this day and even if you have one. Love them and yourself fully and unconditionally everyday of the year.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Love, Leo Brown :)

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Chasing A Cloudy Rainbow.

Hey Cubbers!

How are you? I hope well. The subject that I'm about to write about is something that I've been going back and forth with in my head for awhile.

It's my goal to help you become empowered. With empowerment comes vulnerability. So I'm going to talk about a period in my life where I was young, dumb and a bad judge of character. (Hey, it happens to everyone.)

I'm going to talk about a man who not until recently made me do some inner work within myself. Which lead me to confront my demons.

I'm not going to mention his name. I will mention the lessons that I learned and what my experience with him taught me.  So here goes. The person that graced himself into my life was a man I'll call Lex. I met him through my best friend with whom he worked with.

Okay, this guy is cuter but I just wanted to give
you guys a visual.
The first time I met Lex I'll admit I thought he was cute. Kinda like Jack Black but better looking with piercing blue eyes. Lex and I hit it off and became friends. We didn't see each other often but if there was a party that my friends throw he'd show up.

As time went on we would hang out, have a few drinks,talk into the early morning hours and one thing would lead to another and we'd kiss, touch and experiment with each other. Sounds great right?

There was only one actually, two problems. He was straight, I was gay. He wasn't into me as I was into him. In my head as we kissed. (he was a great kisser.) I saw or wanted to see that we and would have a life together.

That he would admit to himself and embrace the passionate feelings that he displayed when we were together. We would then live happily ever after. That never happened and I'm grateful for it because, I now realize that Lex and I were not only on different paths but we were different people.

I wanted a relationship, not just a fling. (I'll admit, I'm a hopeless romantic.) On top of that whenever we did hookup Lex was drunk. This was something that I ignored every time I saw him.

Lex was simply experimenting and drunk. Meanwhile, I 'm still hoping that we were going to have a deep,passionate connection. With Lex I was able to let my guard down which for someone like me is  not easy feat.

It was one of the first times that I allowed myself to connect to someone. Whenever Lex would sleep off his hangover and not return the affection that I had given him, I would be devastated. I thought that he really cared for me and now looking back at it I realize that he did just not in that way.

Over the next couple of months, Lex and I became closer. He told me that he hated phones and liked letters instead, so he and I would write each other. I thought it was so romantic, hearing from him via letter.

Once the tears have dried you'll be grateful.
I promise. 
In our letters we would just talk about what was going on in our lives. Sometimes he wrote me back, sometimes he didn't.  After my fifth letter, I came to the realization that he and I were friends nothing more.  The “love” that I wanted and “gave” to him would never be returned.

In my last letter, I told him how I felt about him, but more importantly. I told him that I was happy to be his friend. Even though it was painful, I was happy to walk away my illusion. Because it taught me to love myself instead of chasing someone that didn't want to be chased in the first place.

There comes a time when you have to stop and realize that you are chasing something or someone that doesn't want or need to be chased.

Is it fun and exciting to chase something that is unwanted? Of course it is.  On the other hand it's sad because it says that you're placing value on the person you're chasing, not yourself. Think about it.

You have a person who is involved with an already attached person and even though you know in your heart of hearts that this isn't a healthy for you or them you go along with it.

Sure, they'll tell you that they're going to leave their spouse or you'll go along with anything the person you're into because you like the way they make you “feel”.

Fast forward a couple of months or for some years later. What the person who is “love” with the person they're chasing wants from the other person never happens.

You keep begin strung along and in the end you're stuck with two options either walk away with your dignity and pride or keep chasing this person because either you're stuck in it or you hope that someday, one day things will change.

We've all done this, but you have to ask yourself is it worth it? Or are you chasing a cloudy rainbow? You decide.

Love, Leo Brown :)

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Why I may never do a reality show.

Hey Cubbers,

For those that know me beyond social media. You know that I'm a big fan of the art of television. With television comes the plethora of reality shows that many of us watch every week. For some, this is a guilty pleasure. for others, it is a religious experience.  I've recently gotten into the drama that is bravo's 'The Real Housewives of Atlanta'
 Now, I'll admit. I haven't followed this show from the start but there was something about this season that really pulled me in. Try as I might not to watch it. I found myself relating and identifying with many of the show's cast. Namely, Kenya Moore and Kandi Burruss. Kenya for the simple fact that even though she can be a bit "much" she appears to be genuine, honest and very outspoken. Kandi for the fact that she is business-minded, warm and down to earth. Sunday night, as I watched episode thirteen of their sixth season. To say that I was shocked, embarrassed and disgusted is an understatement. Now, before I move forward any further with what I am about to write. I'm going to warn all of you that there will be profanity. Names will be called, so get prepared. Get out your reading glasses, take out your notebooks and get ready to take some notes. Because in this entry, no fucks will be given... at all.  Allow me to get started shall we?

1. Linnethia "Nene" Monique Johnson-Leakes: Bitch, we have a problem. Yes, a serious problem. A bully knows a bully. Trust me, I used to be like you until my chin got checked along with my attitude. Last night you organised that whole scene. What in the entire of fucks was your problem?  What was the prancing about like a very heavy footed rag doll about? Please tell me because, I want answers. See, what your problem is hoe is that you haven't met a real chick that will check that mouth. Which should've happened sooner rather than later. Either that or Iyanla Vanzant needs to call your loud ass out on every stunt you've ever pulled. I get it. You've gone hollywood, gotten some as you call it "trump checks" but bitch just because you've gotten some fame and notoriety does not mean that you have class. Trust me, it didn't work for the back of that thang that's right, thang you call your hair nor does it work for your persona.  You were wrong as the day is short and the nights are long for that stunt queen shit. In my very straight forward opinion you need your ass whipped up and down peachtree street and every well to do establishment needs to ban you from even taking an inhale breath in their presence.  According to your blog, you had this to say about sunday night's bullshit :

I created this game called “Pillow Talk” and it all started from Gregg and I basically discussing our day once we got in bed at night! Obviously this party is for adults only with adult topics and content. I was the hostess with the mostess! The guests were invited along with a dress code and everyone knew what they were walking into. My intentions were to build couple unity within the group but as you can see, things got turnt all the way up! You ask why? Everybody in the room were asked questions that were touchy because that was the bases of the game! We all answered, including me and Gregg. We really had fun with it contrary to what you thought you saw and I stress “what you thought you saw” because there are always intentions for these parties or group gatherings which is totally out of my control! Let’s get to the good stuff: Kenya arrived three hours late to the party! I was really aggravated because we can’t really end the scene until all housewives have arrived! Keeping it real is what I do! Some might call it messy, but see it as you may!

Sorry hoe. I do not and will not buy it. If you call that "keeping it real" than I'd much rather be fake as a new pair of tits. You were bullying and startin' shit plain and simple. Okay, Kenya was three hours late. So the fuck what?! I throw parties as well and if a person arrives late. I fill them in on what they've missed and then like a damn adult that's right blondie an adult. We move on. First of all, who died and made you queen? No damn body. You better be glad that Kenya handled you with class and grace. Because if that had of been someone like myself, you would've been on your back and your hair would've gone from that mess you call blonde to black in a matter of seconds. Ms leakes take my advice and talk to people and not at them next time 'kay? thanks, bye. Oh, and one more thang. Yes, thang. I caution you to eat a very, very big and thick slice of what they call humble pie, just because you've been filling a long time quota doesn't mean you're a member of the club.

2. Kenya Summer Moore: I'll admit. I didn't know what to make of you at first. I fed into the "crazy kenya" thing that the media accused you of begin but then I started to not only watch you but listen to you. What I saw from you was a lot of emotional depth, vulnerability and a need for stability. In many ways I can relate to many of the things you went through as a child especially your rocky relationship with your mother. I have to say Kenya, you handled yourself very well during that mess last night and even though people say you're a bit extra, which I can at times see. The one thing you are not is a liar at least not in this season.  For starters, I take my off my hat to you for three things you did during that fuck shit. 1.) Held your own 2.) Even though you were late you were apologetic and 3.) You kept your temper and didn't knock Nene or Natalie the fuck out. From what I and the rest of the viewers see. You're a bit quirky, you like to spill some tea every now to then but you also know how to relate someone even if you've had differences with them in the past. For that I commend you.

3. Phaedra Parks: Three words for you: Drop.The.Mask.You are very intelligent I'll give you that. A southern belle hmm, somewhat. Now, even though you have degrees and things of that nature. I applaud you for that. The one thing I would like to see from you is well, You. You come off as pretentious, holier than thou and very, very shallow. The one lesson I've learned from watching your story is that image is not everything. You've got a lot and I do mean a lot of inner work to do. 

4. Porsha Williams-Stewart : Beautiful, funny and spoiled as hell. Seek some therapy for your shattered self worth and esteem, don't knowingly marry queens (yeah, I said it!) stop living beyond your means, and learn more about who you are and your legacy and you'll be fine. 

5. Cynthia Bailey and Peter "I'm always broke" Thomas: Damn, where do I start? Cynthia, you and I need to have a very private and long talk. If it wasn't for you, that drama would've never even went down. You need a reality check and your ass beat one good time. See, you're one of those messy queens but you're an undercover messy queen. The one that people need to watch because you're quick to sell out anyone when given the chance and as for your broke, bossy, low down husband (because there is no way I would let him talk at me the way you allow him to.) You don't deserve that well, maybe you do. Oh, and banana boat I mean, Peter learn to mind your own damn business. Two women having a confrontation have nothing to do with you and Cynthia just because your marriage ain't shit doesn't mean everyone else's is like yours. Remember that huh?

6.Christopher Williams and Natalie: Common law and having a marriage license does not equal the same thing. Chris, focus on your career or lack thereof after watching you and your "wife" on the show. You both could do so much better If your marriage is true and real you wouldn't have to resort to a pissing contest on national television. Also, own up to your bullshit! It would've made your scenes go by so much faster.

7. Kandi Burruss and Todd Tucker: Keep making your money, running your businesses and loving each other. In other words, fuck all them hoes!

8. Brandon Deshazer (Kenya's Buddy and Assistant.) I want to give you a big hug and stiff drink. Cause after the shit you've been through you need one .You are one loyal friend and I like that. Even though some people would say you're a follower of kenya's (which I don't see) you stuck up for her and held your own like a true friend and boss would. Trust me, if that had been me and my friends someone would've been limping back from that fight. If you ever need any added protection, call a brotha.

9. Apollo Nida: I had to save your ass for last. You sir, are a got damn fool! In every sense of the word. I'm not going to go into your legal troubles even though you guys can read about it here. I will however say this, you are and were an asshole sunday night. You had no right holding that child down,choking and then beating him like he stole your last protein shake. I know that you're probably doing two things at this moment. Sweating and pacing the floor at the fact that your temper got the best of you on camera in front of millions or you're so excited that you and your boyfriend "Tyrone" will finally, finally be back together in perfect romantic prison bliss. Oh, and that body and color of skin can and only take you so far. But of course, you wouldn't know that. 

(Sighs) Now, that I've gotten that off my chest. I'm going to tell you why I may never do a reality show. 

1. Producers: Producers love drama. Period. If you're not breaking shit, sleeping with half of the cast or have deep secrets you will not be made for television. Now, not all shows are like this of course but over time they become a bit repetitive and it becomes in a word boring. 

2. Money: Contrary to popular belief people who do reality television do not make a great deal of money. Now, if you play it to your advantage television can be a great medium to allow other doors that were once closed to you to open up. Sadly though, a lot of people who do reality television don't either don't have a great team behind them (lawyers) or they don't care because they think it's going to be instant fame. I've got news for you baby, that's not always the case. 

3.Preying on the stupid:  If you don't already have a following, are an outlandish personality, full of drama or you know anything about the entertainment business. Be prepared to not get picked up by the reality show train. What a lot of the public doesn't understand is that creators of television reality shows are looking for what's hot, in the moment or what keeps you glued to your seats. Now, I can't blame them for that, that's they're job. I'm here to tell you though that there is a lot of manipulation that goes on and off camera. Trust it. 

Now, I'm not saying that I wouldn't ever do a reality show if it was offered to me. I would but trust me it would be real and I would at the head of it. Because what we see on the television screens is not "real" by any stretch of the imagination. What say you if you had the chance would you put your life on camera? 

Love, Leo Brown :)
P.S. For those who haven't seen it you can watch it here.

Sunday, January 19, 2014

Stop Comparing and Start Doing! a.k.a Single and Fabulous!

Single: For many of us (not all) this word brings the feeling of begin alone or left behind. Having to be on the same playing field as our friends or other counterparts. Why? I believe this for two reasons:

1. Society- Believe it or not society plays a HUGE role on the way we think, look or even believe in ourselves. Sad but very, very true.

2. Comparing- From the age of puberty and  beyond we start comparing our experience to other's experiences. Now, this can be a double edged sword for many of us. Because on one hand sometimes comparing our experience to someone can motivate and for some inspire us to regroup and refocus on the goals we want to see to completion. The bad thing about this is that when we start comparing our life experience to someone else, we start to limit our potential.

Well, today I say that it is high time we stop comparing and start doing! We are single and fabulous!  My two best friends along with a handful of others are either married, getting married, having kids, have kids and buying homes.

Now, that's great for them right? Of course it is. The keyword here is for them. What works or is meant to happen for someone else happens for that party or group for a reason. Just because it works for them doesn't mean it works for you. Now, before you come for me, I'm not saying that you'll never find that mate or achieve that goal. I'm saying that timing is key.

My best friend said to me that they felt bad for me because I had to play catch up. I will admit that as of late, I've been feeling that way. It's okay to be in your feelings for a minute or two as long as you don't take up residency in it.

Once you stop feeling sorry for yourself and stop comparing your life to another person's. You'll find that the things you need and want are not hard to attain and that more than anything you are in control of your own destiny.

Every person on this vast planet has their own long, winding path to walk. In the words of the immortal actress Anjelica Huston."No man or woman can live another's fate" We all have our own experiences and adventures to live in our own way and on our time and terms.  I've realized that yes, I am single but I am also fabulous! Always have been, always will be.

I've also come to the realization that a man, kids, a home in the burbs', with two cats and a mini van may not be for a bitch like me. Not to say that I don't want it but it suits me just fine if it doesn't happen the way I'd like it to or at all. Besides, If I became a househusband I'd either be in jail for murdering my hubby for his insurance money or I'd be fucking all his friends, the gardener and I'd be a very, very hopeless and bitter alcoholic.

Just because you're not making millions now doesn't mean you won't in the future. Remember, this is your life not a dress rehearsal! If you know what you want, go for it! It doesn't matter what it is. Just do it in your own way, not someone else's. Will this be easy? Um, no but it's worth it because you're walking down your own path.

I've stopped comparing and started to do me. How bout' you?

Love, Leo Brown :)